The math
by Luice
Summary: Both her past and the present with Henry corner Abby, and she feels lost. Set somewhere in the middle of Sigh, but the story takes a different and darker turn than the tv show. Of course I don't own any of the characters involved.
1. Shudder

_**The math**_

_**Shudder **_

"I can do the math", he said, " and besides - no one else would know".

Abby squeezed her eyes shut, and shuddered.

"I did it for us, so that we could be together. Forever." She had no doubt he was smiling lovingly at her.

Abby opened her eyes - she was right, he was actually beaming - and shuddered once more.

She could do the math too - her best friend was her brother, he had just killed off each and everyone of their family and friends, and all this to be with her. Alone, on the accursed island.

She took a step back, feeling tears forming in her eyes. "But Henry, if you love me, you… you can't want this. What about me, don't you think I should have a choice? How could you think I would want everyone I know and love out of my life?"

The desperation were fast catching up on her, and she felt her lips tremble. Suddenly furious at her own weakness showing, she shouted: "Everyone is dead, you are insane!" Retreating further away from him, her tears flowing freely now, she looked for something, anything that she could use to hurt him.

By the kitchen sink she found a glass, and threw it at him, yelling: "It's incestuous!" Henry dodged, avoiding the glass. He looked calmly at her, and said: "I know it's incestuous, and it doesn't matter. I love you, Abby. We have all the time in the world now, and no one will ever bother us anymore."

Feeling her face crumble at the truth of his last statement, Abby shook her head. "No, no" she sobbed. She squeezed her eyes again, with a desperate wish for this being only an exceedingly hellish nightmare. _How could a trusted, loved friend reveal himself to be such a monster?_

Suddenly he was there, embracing her tight. "Oh Abby, it pains me to see you hurt", he whispered into her hair. "Everything will be alright, I'll protect you forever". She stiffened, thrusting her hands against his chest, trying to free herself from his embrace. He only held on tighter, nuzzling her hair, kissing her forehead. Abby couldn't get enough leverage to push him away. Instead she held her body completely still and stiff, not sinking into his arms. At the same time she felt sick and revolted, yet oddly comforted by his presence. _"Habit's a bitch"_ she thought, _"how many times has he comforted me like this before?"._

He surprised her by picking her up, carrying her over to the couch, and putting her down in his lap. She tried to kick him while he carried her, but didn't manage to free herself from his grip. Trying to wriggle away from his lap only made him laugh. "I've got you, Abby, there's no getting away. Unless you are trying to turn me on by wriggling around?" He breathed the last sentence into her ear, and it pulled her up short. Now she really felt sick, and sat stock still, hoping to God that he hadn't turned completely demon. _"What if he tried to… No, there had to be that much left of the Henry she knew, he couldn't possibly mean to do that to her. Then again, she would never had thought him a murderer and a serial killer either." _

"Don't worry", he said into her hair, "I'll never hurt you. I can wait for you. But it's not like we haven't done this before, Abby. Don't you remember?"

Abby shuddered again. Revulsion thick in her throat, she remembered alright.


	2. Always a first

**_Always a first_**

"I'm not taking this crap anymore!" A furious, 19 year old Henry stood by the hammock Abby was lying in. She blinked, sat up, and asked : " What crap, what do you mean, Henry?" She looked worriedly at him. For all the years she had known him, she had rarely seen him angry, and now he was plainly enraged.

"It's the usual Wellington way", he almost spat. "They seem to think I'm a servant working around the clock for them. I won't take it!"

"But," Abby said carefully, " Mr. Wellington has been like that forever, you know, he treats anyone not family like that".

"It's not him", Henry said darkly, "when they're together, Trish takes after him. When he's around, suddenly all I can do is running and fetching for her. The boyfriend-thing seems to slip her mind, and she's just worried about not pleasing daddy. Today, he wanted to play tennis. Trish ordered me to be their ball boy during the game.

"Oh, what did you do?, Abby said. "I just left. It was just to humiliating. You should have heard her tone," Henry muttered. Suddenly he looked at her face. "Abby, what's wrong? Have you been crying?" he asked anxiously, sitting down beside her.

Abby wiped her tear streaked face. "It's nothing, I had a fight with Jimmy", she said. Henry was quiet, waiting for an elaboration. Abby refused to look at him, staring down on her bare toes. After a minute or so of silence, he gathered her in his arms, and said: "You can tell me. After all - I'm your best friend".

Feeling her face flush, Abby shook her head. "No, some things are just to embarrassing to tell", she said, still not looking at him. "Come on, Abby, you can trust me. We've shared some embarrassing stuff in the past, haven't we?" Henry asked. Face crimson, she peered at him between her locks. "This is worse," she said, "much worse."

Henry held her tighter, looking both worried and angry now. "Has he hurt you? If he has, then I'll… I'll…" he stopped abruptly as she whispered mortified: "It was something he said. To Shane. I overheard them. It was awful. And then I yelled at him, and I don't ever want to see him again." She looked up as she felt Henry take a sharp breath, his head thrown suddenly backward. He whispered as he lowered his head again: "What did he say, then?"

She looked down again, feeling Henry pressing his face against her hair. "He said… he said", she stuttered awkwardly before the words rushed out of her: "He told Shane that I was so tight he couldn't get more than two fingers inside." Henry's body stiffened, and he almost shouted in her ear: "Did he do that?!" "Yes," she said indignantly, "that's just what he said. And so I yelled at him, telling him _and _Shane, that he had a really dirty mind and too much imagination as we've never gone past kissing. And Shane started laughing, he practically rolled around, and I, I slapped Jimmy and ran away".

Henry visibly relaxed, loosening his grip on her arms. Abby stared a little surprised at the red marks left by his hands, she hadn't realized he had held her so hard. Now he was stroking her hair instead, and murmured: "He's a bastard. Made a right fool of himself, didn't he? Shane's going to tell everyone".

Abby gasped: "Noooo, I hadn't thought of that! Oh my God, Henry, I can't show my face on this island anymore. " She felt Henry smile into her hair. "Jimmy's the one who'll come off looking pathetic," he said, sounding amused. He continued: "And here we are, two best friends with the world's two most stupid significant others. We really should get drunk and forget about them." She laughed, and said mischievously: "Why don't we get seriously drunk? My parents are out of town until tomorrow afternoon."

Xxx

Deep down in a bottle of whisky, and after a couple of beers, Henry asked: "How come you and Jimmy never, ah, well…" "Had sex?" Abby said, a bit slurred. "Mmm, yeah, why?" he said, looking curious. "I had plans for tonight," Abby giggled. Henry sat up straight: "Tonight? So the fight ruined the big night? " "Yeah," Abby said, "now I'll be a virgin forever." Rolling her eyes dramatically and pulling her hair back, she sighed in mock desperation. She didn't notice Henry moving closer, until he kissed her exposed neck. "We can remedy that," he murmured against her throat. "What, you're tickling me! You take being the best friend in the world to a new level now," Abby said laughingly. He looked her straight in the eyes, and said: "Abby, I'm not joking."

Xxx

Abby was breathing hard, staring at the roof. "Wow, Henry, I'm still not sure if this was a good idea, but it was definitively better than I thought it would be." He smiled, still on top of her, and said: "I heard that. You were kind of, aaah, loud. It's a good thing your parents isn't at home, because you would have made me look really bad. I can only imagine your father's face…" Abby flushed, and Henry said quickly: "But between the two of us, it made me feel really good." She hesitated before asking: "And for you, was it worth it?" He bent down and kissed her: " Absolutely."


	3. Whimper

**_Whimper_**

_At the time, I misunderstood him completely, _Abby realized. _I thought he was angry and upset on my behalf. Instead, he was probably jealous thinking about me and Jimmy, and already wanting me for himself. _

Dragging her thoughts away from the now polluted memories, Abby shook her head angrily: "I, we, none of us knew! How could we know? Who would loose her virginity to her brother?"

Henry played with her hair, stroked it lovingly, even pulling it slightly. "Well, you did. And as I recall, we both enjoyed it. We didn't think it all too wrong then, why should this little fact come between us now?"

Abby turned her head and looked up at him, really looked at him for the first time since waking in the house. "You seriously mean this, Henry?" she asked, her voice wavering and almost breaking.

His eyes almost drank in her face and her looking at him, and he murmured a hoarse "yes" before forcing his mouth onto hers. Abby seized up, struggling, finally breaking free from his grip. She crept back on the couch, eyes locked on him to detect any movement. He was panting with his eyes closed, but keeping still on the same spot.

"I'm sorry, Abby" he said. "I know it's too soon, but the memories brought it all back." "Or rather it's way too late", Abby said scathingly. "We agreed to never, ever talk about it again because of Trish, we were going to pretend it never happened."

He opened his eyes, and said calmly: "And that's why Trish had to go too, you know. I wanted to touch you again and I wanted you to remember it. And you didn't want to as long as she existed." Abby's hand flew to her mouth, his words stinging her. "No, you can't lay the blame on me, Henry. This, all this killing had nothing to do with me!"

He cocked his eyebrows at her and replied: "I would never have done this but for you. And back then, it was you who were the most worried about my relationship with her. I would've dumped her any day. So, it was clear to me that she was in our way. As was the rest of them - always calling, nagging, being like a wall of human flesh between us. Friends, family - everyone taking up your time, and taking you away from me."

Abby bowed her head, his words echoing her worst fear: _This was all her fault. Her fault. Her fault. No one would have died if she hadn't come back. No one. _She tried to reason with her fear, telling herself that she was not to blame for other people's actions, but the fear still clung to her, polluting her mind.

He pulled closer, grabbing hold of her again. She let it happen, too tired, too sad and too frightened to fight him. "Abby, Abby, don't be so sad, you've got me", he said lightly, rubbing his nose against her chin. "We've got each other now, and you know you can trust me." She felt him move towards her mouth, and turned her head quickly away. "And it wasn't only that first time, remember when you visited me at college?" he said, trying to get her to look at him.

This time, she whimpered.


	4. Who's up for seconds?

**_Who's up for seconds?_**

"Henry, I'm sooo drunk!" Abby exclaimed. The frat party was reaching it's limit, people were crawling on the floor, dancing on the tables, couples were making out everywhere and a few had even fell asleep. Henry walked smoothly over to her, steadying her as she staggered. She peered up at him, saying: "Aren't you drunk at all? You're the one who should be, because of Trish and the break-up thing!" She clasped her mouth, eyes big with shock at her own words, and said: "I'm sorry, Henry. I didn't mean to mention it, I just hoped you were having a good time." He smiled at her as her hands went up to his face, stroking him softly as to comfort him. Leaning down to her, he said: "I've completely forgotten why I'm here. What break-up? Who's Trish?" Abby sniggered drunkenly, and replied: "That's so funny, the party's working out for you, then!" He shouted in her ear, as someone cranked the volume up even further: "It's the company! Not the party!" " Always the perfect gentleman, aren't you!" she shouted back. "Can I borrow your keys? I'm tired, and if I don't get away soon, Sully will corner me - _again._ "

As an answer, he took her arm and pulled her along. "You don't need to leave", Abby protested, "go on, have fun, find an girl, Henry!" He shook his head, and said: "And what will the girl say when she finds out that my bed is already occupied by you? I'll bet she'll run screaming, thinking I'm some kind of maniac - maybe a serial killer collecting college girls or something. And, I have to live up to your image of me the perfect gentleman." "No, no", Abby frowned at him, waving her finger, "you know jokes about serial killers doesn't go down all that well with me." Henry looked at her, his expression serious. "I'm sorry, I know. It's not funny when you know the real thing so well. But seriously, I won't pick up girls when you're staying in my flat." Abby hiccupped, and let herself be dragged along by him.

As they left the party, dozens of people started to holler the lyrics to the song that was on - "Let's get loud" by Jennifer Lopez. Abby started to sing along, laughing and shouting the chorus as they got outside. Henry just shook his head, and said: "You know, Abby, you are loud". He smiled to himself, as if he were referring to some kind of a private joke.

In the apartment, she felt more drunk than she had thought she was. She just sat down on the bed, her head in her hands, while the room was doing a little swaying dance in front of her. "You're really wasted," Henry said, sitting on his knees in front of her. Looking at her, he started to pull her boots off. As she made no move to continue undressing, he just kept on doing it for her.

Xxx

Sometime later, she was lying on her back. Henry knelt between her legs, positioning himself for thrusting into her. He looked down on her with a odd expression. "You look funny", she drawled. He just closed his eyes, leaning over her, and started moving.


	5. Sigh

**_Sigh_**

She whimpered again. "You knew, didn't you? The second time?" He was quiet for a brief moment, before nodding. "Yes", he said simply, "I knew". "But you doubted, I remember the way you looked at me, you weren't sure," Abby almost pleaded with him. He sighed, and said: "I was sure. Very sure, but it was strange, knowing that you didn't know."

_He's been like this for a long time. He actually had sex with me knowing full well that I'm his sister. But there may have been telltale signs since forever - I just never realized it. What is he then - has he always been a monster? If so, is he still the friend I trusted too? Can he be both? _Confusing thoughts were churning around in her mind, giving her no peace. Guilt, fear, revulsion, anger and betrayal mixing up with a goodly sized portion of sorrow. But the driving force behind the tornado of feelings was the tiny bit of love and trust that still was a part of the mix. _How can you leave a lifetime of trust and love behind? _

Abby sighed, and the stupid tears were once again leaking from her eyes. Henry kissed her wet cheeks and her eyes. This time she couldn't muster enough willpower to get away, she just sat there, crying. Her not resisting seemed to embolden him, and his kisses grew more passionate. She tried to turn her face away, succeeding only to sink into his lap. He sighed contentedly, whispering "I love you, and I knew you'd come round". For a short while, he was quiet. Abby squeezed her eyes, trying again to pretend that this was only a nightmare. But it just didn't work, and the fear and the loneliness were winning. She was so tired, so alone, and she felt the last bits of fighting spirit leaving her.

"Don't worry, Abby, you've got me", he whispered as he caressed her. He carefully touched her neck, pulling her head up. He looked at her, smiled tenderly and leaned down to kiss her. Abby sighed raggedly, tears still flowing. When his lips met hers, she had given up, and her head just didn't turn away like it was supposed to do.


	6. Third time is the charm

_**Third time is the charm**_

Abby's thoughts flickered through her past, trying to find signs of when Henry's betrayal started. There must have been plenty of them, but she'd never realized what it meant. _Why would she? _Because it was a true betrayal, well done - to her, her father, to Trish, to the rest of the Wellingtons, to JD, uncle Marty, to their friends, to Shane and the rest of the people on the island. And to Jimmy. _Jimmy - he'd hate her now. But he was dead, wasn't he? Like everyone else. _But even thinking of Jimmy hating her was better than what was taking place right now.

Xxx

Weakness, she just plain hated it. It just wasn't her - weakness and her didn't compute. Then again, she hadn't the strength to fight him. _Because - there was nothing worth fighting for anymore._ _And that's what he had planned for,_ she supposed. When everything she knew, and almost everyone except him was gone, why would she fight? Her defenses was down, and she had lost. He was winning, and - yes - she could feel he enjoyed it. Henry was literally swelling against her hip.

Xxx

At first, he had just kissed her. Deeply, passionately, moving down on her throat. Her brain did receive the odd shivers of fear - but she just couldn't register it. _This wasn't her - none of this was really happening. _She decided that this was a truly realistic nightmare, and she'd wake up soon, scared but awake. Then he ripped open her tank top and her bra - but then again , that was probably a part of the nightmare too. _Any moment now - she'd wake up._ Him kissing and squeezing her breasts seemed like a natural part of such a bad dream, but it didn't stop at that. _When would she wake up? _He tore off her jeans and panties, and now she got really worried. _Was this nightmare going to last forever? Why wouldn't she wake up? _ She felt herself being picked up, and carried bridal-style up the stairs. Then they were in a room she'd never seen before in the house, and he laid her down on a large bed. His bedroom. The sheets were red satin, and all she could think of as he pulled down his jeans and crept up to her was: _Red sheets. How predictable and pathetic. _

Xxx

Plainly, it was the aftermath. He was kissing her, stroking her, saying silly, lovestruck words to her. "This is our third time together," he said, "and I know you'll love me just like I love you. Everything is going to be perfect, and I'll protect you forever. The next time, I won't be in such a hurry, and I'll promise to make it better for you, like I did before."

Whatever he said, she didn't care. She almost didn't care what he'd do to her either, but… _this wasn't her. She was Abby Mills. She was resourceful, strong, a survivor. No, she couldn't allow Henry Dunn, her former best friend and now insane brother, to reduce her to such a sorry pile of human wreckage. No. She'd stop him, but how? _Resolution were slowly winning against despair. No more tears for Abby Mills from this point on. She would cry later.


	7. Moan

_**Moan**_

It would be difficult to get out of the bed without him noticing. Besides, she couldn't get out of the house - it was all locked up. She had to make him trust her to get away. _Yes, that was the only way, _she concluded_. _He was sleeping, but still clutching her tightly to him, like he was afraid to let her go even in his sleep. Her thighs was wet and sticky after his lovemaking - _none of the wetness from her, _she reminded herself. He had to believe her. He had to believe she cared about him. Then, she'd make her escape. _But what did she have to do to make him trust her? _

Xxx

As it turned out, he was prepared to NOT believe. No simple words and smiles seemed to unlock his trust, he still followed her around, still locked her up if he had to leave her sight. He was never really violent, but she could see that the_ urges_, as he called the part of him that had made him kill everyone, were close to his surface. Still he was prepared to have sex with her several times a day.

So she moaned - at least she tried too. "Not convincing, Abby," he shook his head, "will you stop faking it?" She stared at him, panic fluttering in her stomach. _What would she have to do to make him believe? _"I've seen you not faking it, after all, and I'll have no trouble spotting the difference," he continued calmly. "I'll make sure you'll never have to fake it with me". _Oh my God, she was going to be violently sick. _

Her resolution was almost wearing down, when she suddenly struck the key. _She had to believe too. _

She realized, he read her like an open book. They simply knew each other too well for games. So, if she were to fool him into thinking she accepted and maybe even loved him, she had too fool herself - _almost. _The problem was, it wasn't that difficult. Because in a way she did care for him still.


	8. On all fours

_**On all fours**_

_Damn it, _she thought, _this must stop soon. What more could she do? _She smiled at him, humoured him, made him… well, satisfied, and lied to his face about loving him. Then again, maybe she didn't lie as much as she really wanted to believe. She tried to forget herself, tried to loose Abby Mills when he made love to her, and while he was sleeping, she tried to remember her conviction: _One day, she'd get away. Soon. _

She felt like she was splitting herself up inside, being two people at once. One part remembered Henry the friend and first lover, the other part of her remembered only the twisted brother and killer. This part, she hid deep inside with her belief in escape, like a small, lidded well at the core of herself. But she couldn't allow herself to think of Jimmy. Thinking of Jimmy was the one thing that would make her cry again, and she was done crying.

Xxx

And gradually, Henry began to believe the part she allowed him to see. Abby did the best she could to exploit her inner split. She told him she loved him, while thinking of her childhood friend, she made him breakfast and thought of ordering pizza for breakfast after drunken bouts at the university, and she tried to _be _romantic. Drinking wine while watching sunsets, massages - whatever he wanted.

Dinner he preferred to cook himself, as they both knew she was an exceptionally bad cook. "Did you dress up for dinner?" he said, turning around from the boiling kettle with delicious smelling pasta sauce. "All that, just for me?" His eyes were full of appreciation as he looked her up and down. She smiled lightly at him, and answered: "Of course I did it for you. Who else is there to dress up for?" Inside, she were grinding her teeth. _You made sure there are no one else to dress up for. You bastard! _

But still, she felt like she was on all fours, not getting one step closer to freedom. For all purposes, she was all his. Besides, he seemed to like her on all fours. Only it was a shame to her hidden self that she liked it too.


	9. Grunt

_**Grunt**_

He pampered her, it was clear enough. Treating her like a queen, and bowing to almost every wish she made known. Except - leaving the property alone. She begged for it, saying her fitness - no, her happiness - depended on running each day.

"Please, Henry, you know I love to run. Don't you trust me?", she'd ask. He would just smile at her, and said: "Of course I trust you. But these woods are tricky, and I'd hate to see you sprain your ankle by falling over a tree root or something." Then he offered to run with her, and so they did - running in the forest every day. He rather enjoyed it more than her, she thought, because the runs usually ended with her up against a tree or with the hard roots on the ground grinding against her back. "It's like I'm chasing you, it excites me", he panted as a way of explanation. Still, the running got her outside the house.

Xxx

Gradually, she began to see that they were not completely alone on the island. The food ran out, and Henry would disappear for a day or so before bringing more food and wine into their storage room. Sometimes his absences scared her. Not because she was afraid to be alone, but because she missed him. Then again, she could use this feeling against him when he came home - her being happy to see him was obviously convincing.

"Abby", he grunted, taking her hard up against a wall, "I love you so much. Did you really miss me today?"

"Yes," she gasped, feeling him fill her up completely, " I missed you, Henry, I missed you.". _I missed you, and I hate myself, _she thought.

Xxx

After a while, she began to suspect that there was someone else alive. Someone much closer than the people providing food. Henry would lock her up on a regular basis and slip out _with food_ - to God knows where. Abby concluded that Henry had another prisoner. If there was a prisoner, there was hope. She might have an ally. Or - it might be John Wakefield himself, for all that she knew.


	10. The fifth wheel

_**The fifth wheel**_

And then one day, he suddenly trusted her. He just told her that he'd have dinner ready after her run, but that she should be careful while running. Abby ran - she ran like never before, feeling free as a bird. She tried to get her bearings on where they were, but as she had suspected: Henry was still a smart guy, albeit a crazy one. They were on the far side of the island, and the house was the only one for miles. If she wanted to run from him, she'd have to run for hours to get to the town. Chances were he'd catch her long before.

Xxx

So she came back "home", like everything was normal and she was just a girl coming home to her boyfriend. Henry was satisfied - _no, he was proud of himself for making her loving him, she could tell,_ but she also saw that he had prepared to hunt her. On the porch, she observed nothing less than a vicious looking boarding knife, two guns, a coil of rope and a GPS. She almost laughed at the last item - it seemed so modern, non-Harper's Island-ish as she could imagine anything to be.

She pretended to be surprised, asking Henry what he needed the weapons for. He shook his head, saying: "Come on, Abby, you're not that dim-witted. You know I would never let you escape me". So she looked at him, eyes wide, walked up close to him and said: "Escape? What do you mean? Don't you think I want to be with you?" Henry didn't seem all that convinced by her show this time, but she stood on her toes - _her insides screaming for her to run _- and kissed him. He clamped down on her mouth like she knew he would do.

Xxx

Later that week, he took her to see the prisoner. It was Jimmy, and her heart almost stopped. "Jimmy!" she gasped, conscious of Henry watching her closely. He seemed poised on the brink of violence, ready to pounce on Jimmy - _not her - _at any moment.

Jimmy looked up at her, but being gagged, the only thing expressing his love for her were his eyes.

He was indeed alive, but in an awful state - Henry had obviously not been feeding him enough, and besides he was bruised like hell. She tried to count the days since Wakefield's death, and was surprised - it was almost four months now. _Why was Jimmy still bruised? Henry must have been beating him - a lot, as it seemed. _So she didn't dare to show her relief that any one besides herself was alive - especially not that this someone was Jimmy. It was easy enough to understand what Henry's treatment of him stemmed from: _The bruises were there because of her._

While her heart screamed, and while Henry jealously watched her every miniscule movement, she turned away from Jimmy, and pouted: "I thought you wanted no one but us on the island?" Then she kissed Henry, deeply and passionately. Jimmy was gagging, she heard it clearly, but she was more concerned about keeping him alive than making him keep his breakfast - if he had had any. She turned back to Jimmy, seeing the expected expression of shock, hurt and outrage. It almost killed her.

Henry beamed surprised and fondly at her, ruffling her hair, and said: "Do you really want me to kill him? I spared him for a purpose - he'll sign a confession to clear us both. But he wouldn't sign it without seeing you. When he has signed, well, this fifth wheel will go. "

_Clear us both? No, _she thought, _I have no part in this! But - if he's starting to think so, then he must truly believe. It is definitively time. _

So she kissed Henry again, and said: "I trust your plan." With a conviction felt even by the hidden, Henry-hating part of herself, she added: "You are one of the best planners in the world."

All she needed now was the boarding knife or the guns. And to divert Henry from killing Jimmy until tomorrow.


	11. Shatter

_**Shatter**_

In the evening she found the boarding knife. Henry had hidden it rather cleverly, she thought, but now it was hers. One thing sickened her: The letters _J.W. _were burned onto the handle.

As Henry made love to her - as usual before breakfast - she allowed herself to feel sad for him. By the end of the day, he might be dead. She didn't think she could kill Henry herself, but Jimmy might do it. Or else they could just run to the town. It would be easier fending off Henry when they were two.

She told Henry she'd go for her usual run in the woods, but she hurried to where the boarding knife was hidden. With the big knife in hand, she ran to the place where he kept Jimmy. Jimmy panicked when she entered with the knife - believing she'd gone crazy too and that she was going to finish him. She freed him from the shackles, expecting him to hold her, comfort her and thank her. He didn't.

Xxx

Instead he said accusingly: "I remember what you said, and how you kissed him. You were more than convincing to me - and to him. How can I be sure this isn't some sick game between the two of you? You freeing me, him hunting me down to finally kill me?"

She was thunderstruck - he didn't believe in her. Jimmy - _of all people - _thought she loved Henry and that she was in on the _plan_. "But Jimmy," she said, " I've been a prisoner for months! How can you think that I NOT want him dead?"

"I've been a prisoner for months too," Jimmy answered, "and it seems to me you got the better deal. At least you got food and no bruises." "No," she said quietly, "I haven't got that many bruises to show off. That doesn't mean I'm unharmed. Jimmy…" He looked at her, the pleading in her voice stopping his retort. But still he didn't hold out his arms to her, and she had so wanted to fall into his embrace.

Abby realized that Jimmy was in no shape to outrun Henry on the way to town. So, Henry would have to go. No police, no jail, no trial for Wakefield's son, just justice dealt by two people with revenge on their minds.

Jimmy was in on killing Henry. Only, when she told him that she wanted him to do it, he wasn't all that happy. "Alright," he sighed, "I'll try to take Henry down. But only because I can't afford the chance not too."

At his words, she could _hear_ something shatter inside of her.


	12. A sixth sense

_**A sixth sense**_

Jimmy had the boarding knife. She had told him to hide in the forest, on top of the cliff. Abby would get Henry out there. "You've got to come! It's so beautiful, you should see the sun on the waves! Please, Henry," she wheedled. "And", she laughed, "try to catch me - I know you want to!" His eyes lit up, and then she ran, hearing his feet pounding behind her.

The one part of her that remembered the friend felt guilty. She was sick to her guts for deceiving him so - and at the same time the other part of her congratulated herself on a successful betrayal. Her betrayal may have matched his, she thought, a sour taste to her mouth. The first part remembered how he'd taken her out there to watch the ocean at sunsets, and they even had a spot where it was comfortable to sit, sharing a bottle of wine. _No, _the second part of her decided, _such thoughts can't interfere now. Remember: He is a monster. It's time to become whole again. _The hatred flooded, drowning all other feelings.

Xxx

Everything happened so fast. Jimmy came hurtling out of the woods, and threw himself at Henry. Henry spun on his feet, like he had been expecting an attack. Abby was a tiny bit impressed at the speed he reacted with. Just as fast as if he had a sixth sense, he wrestled the boarding knife out of Jimmy's hands - but then they both toppled over the edge of the cliff.

Xxx

It was a long way down, but Abby thought she might have made it down the path in seconds. Henry was lying at an odd angle, his face drawn in pain. She walked up to him, staring - still waiting for him to rise ready to kill her and Jimmy, but he didn't. He was finally just as helpless as she had been in his hands. She picked up the boarding knife a few meters from his feet.

As she closed in, he looked at her, whispering: "I always thought you were no killer". Her eyes filling with sudden, inexplicable tears, she answered softly: "And so I thought of you too. Once. But people change." When she stabbed him, it was easier than she had thought. Henry's eyes widened, and he sighed: "But Abby, I loved you." And like that, he was gone.


	13. Shut down

_**Shut down**_

She went over to check on Jimmy. He'd had a hard fall, but seemed alright. Abby helped him up, supporting him, and they staggered on, towards people, help and sanity.

Xxx

Sitting on the boat back to the mainland, he finally laid his arm around her shoulder. She rested her head against him, and relaxed - feeling the tension of months leaving her slowly. _Everything would be alright now, wouldn't it?_

Xxx

At first, the problem was that Jimmy didn't quite believe her story. Then the problem became that he DID believe her. She could see that he shut down, listening to her was too much for him. The hurt, the humiliation, the pretence- it just didn't add up to him. He was not at all comfortable with the way she had survived with Henry.

"It's, it's not right, Abby," he said, "you tricked him. In a way that's the worst of it all - you did the same to him that he did to you – trickery and betrayal. He thought you loved him. How could you be such a good actor? I can't understand it - it seems to me like you used him as much as he used you. If I were you, I think I'd rather had him kill me, than doing what you did."

She could neither understand him, nor explain in a way that made sense to him that she had split up herself. The fact that she had found a part of her that loved Henry and that she had used the emotion to survive was simply to much for him.

Xxx

So she did what she did the first time a Wakefield had a rampage - she shut down too, and just stopped talking. And like the last time, after the police finally told her that they'd finished after weeks of interrogation, she didn't say goodbye.

Xxx

Her cat in L.A. was pleased to see her, though.


	14. Irrational numbers

_**Irrational numbers**_

She was retching. Every morning, though she got better during the day. At first, she didn't understand it, then she thought that she had the damndest luck in the world. A child, _Henry's child. "_Well, four months with more than daily sex can do that to you"_,_ she said bitterly to her cat, but still it was unexpected. And she really didn't want to have his child.

Xxx

At seven o'clock on a summer evening, she had the baby. After seeing her son for the first time, she decided that there was no giving him up to adoption, like she had planned. _Besides, it was easy to do the math: Adoption didn't seem to work too well with a Wakefield,_ Abby almost laughed to herself. She looked at the baby nestling in her arms, thinking him the greatest of the world's wonders. Dark hair and eyes, she prayed he would look like her. Now she would have someone else than the cat to care for again. And maybe - _no definitively, for the baby's sake - _she would try to reconcile herself with her past: The hurt, the pain, the grief _and_ the love. Somehow, she would make the irrationality add up to herself.

Even though he strictly speaking was part Wakefield, she was positive that he wouldn't end up like them. _She'd make sure of that. Besides, he wasn't only a Wakefield, he was a Mills too. _

And his name was to be Charlie. Charlie H. Mills.

**Author's note: **

_My intention was to write a love story between Abby and Henry, and I really wanted to make it a happy ending... But after chapter five, I realized that Abby was too strong to give in - she'd never forget, and never forgive Henry completely. I mean - murders, rape, imprisonment, not forgetting the incest... I felt that Abby would have more selfrespect than to accept that. So the story ended this way because Abby's character grew on me, but I feel really, really bad for Henry... :( _


End file.
